Complemented by a Crisp Chardonnay
OK, now the last time I had a cat was about twenty years ago, I admit. And I want the best for my new little guy. But people, I'm telling you, somewhere during the last twenty years the pet world HAS GONE INSANE.
I'm giving Glitch a nice mix of all the catty foods - he gets raw kangaroo meat*, chicken wings, tinned fish and Science Diet for kittens. He likes all these things. And because I aim to be a good cat father, I also scan the supermarket shelves for other possibilities to keep his diet varied.
Today I found 'Fancy Feast® Royale' Natural Whitemeat Seafood in Tuna Jus. This is what it says on the back:
A delicious delicacy for fish connoisseurs: we start by hand selecting the ocean's finest filets of Tuna, then we mix the filets with Seabream and Whitebait and baste in a Tuna Jus.Solely in the interests of blogging, I had to buy a packet so I could show you all. (He is seriously not getting this stuff in the normal course of events). Hand selected filets? Basted in a Tuna Jus? I haven't opened the little foil sachet yet, but I'm betting that when I do, what I'm actually going to be squeezing out is a big blob of fish mush.
And if mealtime goes anything like last night, it will be a case of him gobbling it all down as fast as he can, licking his bum and then snacking on a nice crunchy black cockroach for dessert.
My cat is is pure class.
*People from other countries please don't freak out; kangaroos are culled here for a number of reasons and the meat is not wasted. There are a lot of kangaroos. The meat is good lean meat, and sensible people will eat it. It tastes good. However, because the meat eaters of the world (including Australians) for some reason are obsessed with beef, instead of most kangaroo meat being used on the barbecue, it ends up as pet food. This is insane because one of the very worst agricultural things that ever happened to this country was the introduction of beef cattle.
UPDATE:Well, I have to confess that when I opened the sachet of Fancy Feast Royale, it didn't look nearly as puke-making as I expected. There were obvious chunks of different kinds of fish, and even whitebait. The tuna 'jus' looked suspiciously like... aspic. In fact, wait a minute, the whole thing looked just like the tinned fish I've been feeding him anyway...
And I'm sure you are all dying with anticipation... yes, he did like it. A lot. He ate it all up. And then licked his bum and tried to eat a piece of uncooked spaghetti that I dropped on the kitchen floor.